Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Well, this is just sick.

I'm on a bit of a self-sanctioned sabbatical and had not planned on beating out a post today; however, tonight after I got in from walking my dog, I sat down to some dinner when I practically choked on my chicken - for apparently, Wednesday, April 30 2008 , is National Spankout Day. Now, I have heard of some sick excuses for holidays in my day, but just who exactly had the brilliant idea to rub this one out? I mean, an entire holiday focused solely on spanking? Seriously - what kind of jerk offered this idea? He was probably a real wanker. Whoever he was, I'm glad we didn't have to hear what other wacky ideas this lame holiday beat off to cream all of its competition and take over April 30 as its very own. Now, if you'll excuse me: I'm pretty tired, so I think I'll just take a load off and toss off for the night. Happy Spankout Day, you perveltons.

hey. why don't you polish this off: humor-blogs.com

9 comments:

Alice said...

And I thought it was PROMOTING spanking. I had to put my wooden spoon away once I saw the site. The kids cheered.

Bee said...

Listen, whatever people do in the privacy of their spunky homes is fine by me.

Malcolm said...

I had no idea there was a National Spankout Day. For no apparent reason, on the way home from work the other day I was thinking of songs about self pleasure: She Bop, Dancing With Myself, and Turning Japanese came to mind. I have considered playing these as a set on my show... we will see.

Unknown said...

Thanks for the reminder... I've been devoutly observing the holiday all day!

Although, I've been suffering from some strange health issues that have hindered my ability to truly enjoy the special day. For some reason my eyesight seems to be degrading and there are strange hairs growing out of my palm. Anyone have any ideas?

Frank Santos said...

No ideas, but the washing machine just broke so I'll have to... finish the load by hand.

Wasn't it Carlin who said, "when all else fails, go for the dick joke?"

avogle said...

Hee hee, Alice. Save that wooden spoon for later, my friend.

Bee, your open mind is what The Great Spankout of '08 was made for.

Malcolm, I LOVE it. Blister in the Sun, anyone?

Cory, I hear the symptoms are even worse in the bowels of hell. My condolences.

Frank, welcome aboard. You come bearing a wad of wisdom. That is always welcome in these parts.

Anonymous said...

Damn...I missed National Spankout Day! I'll have to make up for lost wanks! My favorite absurd holiday tho is Talk Like A Pirate Day...which I cannot do...(except arrrrgh..I can do that)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I'm offended that this is restricted to National status only. I'm making it my personal goal to take this mission and message world-wide and have INTERNATIONAL Spankout Day.

Maybe International House Of Pancakes will sponsor it? They can introduce something to promote it like pancakes with fresh, whipped cream. Oh wait, they already do that. Are they secretly behind the scenes promoting this already?!!?

Anonymous said...

"jerk offered" is my favorite one.

well played.

sinner.