Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Ride 'em, Cowboys.

Giddy up, Partners! A joyous Cowboy Poetry Week to one and all! Loosen your chaps, mount up, and sit a spell. It's high time us buckaroos pay a little poetic tribute to the cow punchers on the range, and what better time than these seven glorious days sanctioned by California's own Kindergarten Cop himself (click on that distinguished letter to your right, why don't you?) to say a little howsyafatha to the ranchers of the world ?

Now, come on, Americans: These are your hard-earned tax dollars at work, so you might as well take full advantage of this literary powerhouse extravaganza.

See how completely not asslike at all my own governor, Sonny Perdue, looks taking the time from his busy draught protection schedule to sign the bill to proclaim this a real life state holiday for a whole entire week:My own personal celebration involves spending a lot of alone time thinking about how important cowboy poetry is to my life. In addition, I will be devoting a respectable portion of the week to paying homage to the most undervalued form of cowboy poetry: the cowboy haiku. I have already written four, which I will humbly share with you. It is my hope that you will follow my lead and spend some of your own time paying your respects to the poetry of our cowpokes on the range.

Cowboy Troy
How can I put this?
This guy’s a country singer.
Are we being punked?

Macho, Macho Man

He lassoed my heart,
The finest in the Village
Giddy up, Cowboy!

Naked Cowboy

It’s a singing ass.
Sweet Lord, this guy’s made millions.
Funny joke, there, God!

Cowboy Curtis

You rocked the Playhouse.
Didn’t you bone Miss Yvonne?
Bet Pee Wee was pissed.

And, an added bonus. Literally, a cornucopia of asshat:

for a smorgasboard of literary giddy up, click right here: humor-blogs.com


what's a donzer said...

This is by far the most annoying post I have ever posted. I just spent about ninety hours trying to align the damn pictures with the damn words, and dammit, dammit, it's still effed. Cowboys, I hope you get effed this week as hard as I just did.

Freddy said...

The post was clever and your comment hilarious...and yes it looks like a photographic layout design nightmare!
But that is the price paid for being as brilliant as you are!
And all mamas should let their babies grow up to be cowboys so long as they are naked.

dub-b said...

This reminds me of my days as a ranch hand...

cowboy for a week
branding and de-nutting calves
i paid to do this?

cory said...

Here's my stab at it...

Tough and rugged men
ropin and ridin all day
brokeback mountain nights

what's a donzer said...

Haha. That's nice, Freddy. Clever/brilliant/fascinatingly huge waste of time...they're all in the same family, right?

Dub-b: I LOVE this. I think you should send this in for the brochure.
Did you save any of the nuts?

Cory: A valiant effort. That movie is a classic. Way to make me happy and bittersweetly in need of some Ennis all at the same time.

damon said...

Have to love cowboys,
gay people loved the movie,
their cheerleaders are way hot.

clickin for ya cowboy style!

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

You frighten me, babe.

Alice said...

I felt this post needed "Save A Horse, Ride a Cowboy" playing in the background. It's my favorite all-male review music and would have enhanced my pleasure. ; )

Bee said...

Ahhhhh you made me remember Cowboy Curtis' hawtness and now I will have some sweet dreams!