Friday, April 11, 2008

A poetic interlude with a crotchy focal point.

Again - limerick time, aimed straight at the junk. Remember before when my husband was sick of the long(ish) posts? He put in another wham bam thank you ma'am request, so, you know, naturally my brain went straight to the crotch. Specifically, to junk disappearing from the crotch, and to crotch spillage. Well, you'll see. And, sorry in advance.

There once was a wank named C. Top
Who owed all his fame to the prop
But when none gave a damn
Looks like 'roids he did ram
Watch out, Red, or your nads may ne’er drop!

Have you met our friend, Fergalicious?
The guys found her oh so delicious
But you don’t wanna see
Any chick doused in pee
One soaked crotch makes the public so vicious!

I don't know. Sorry. You'll feel better if you go here:


cory said...

HAHA!! Those were sooo funny I almost peed my pants!

Did you hear that Fergie? I almost peed my pants... maybe you should try that instead next time. All the fun with none of the embarrassment. Its a win win!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Only Golden Shower fetishists find Fergie delicious.

That sheet ain't fictitious!

damon said...

Remember, the Ferg did get her start with the Black Eyed Pees.

Nice with the limericks.

It's tricky to rock a rhyme,
to rock a rhyme,
that's right on time,
it's tricky.

(Bonus points for naming that song!)

John said...

Wow. Naming that song is quite tricky. It's tricky, tricky, tricky.

After all, this blog is her recital. I think it's very vital that she name that rhyme. That's right. "Tricky" is the title.

dub-b said...

Nicely done know I'm a big fan of the limericks! And now I see that there are Run DMC lyrics in the comments...Today must be a 10 on the mellish meter!

And now to keep the lyrics going (and slightly modified for you, donzer)...
In New York the people talk and try to make her rhyme
They really hawk but she just walks because she has no time
And in the city it's a pity cause she just can't hide
Tinted windows don't mean nuthin, they know who's in side.

Freddy said...'s so nice to get my first morning laugh from you! Abercrombie and Fitch has a new shopping bag that's a crotch shot. I want to get one and do something artsy-obscene to it. If you're feeling crafty, I bet you could make an awesome one!

Freddy said...

and regarding Fergie...I'm just glad she didn't shit her pants.....

Theresa said...

LMAO! At least your crotch poetry is equal opportunity, something for both men and women so nobody feels left out. :-D

what's a donzer said...

Wow, Cory. That's some enthusiasm! YIPPEE! AWESOME! SWEET! THANKS FOR THE COMMENT!

EWBL: A lovely rhyme with some meaningful truth. You're like the aphoristic Ben Franklin of the

Damon, I just giggled like a five year old. Black Eyed Pees! hee hee. A nicely played bring back of Tricky, as well. I have quite the dance routine to that one I'll unveil one day. I've got moves You Tube has never seen before!

John and Dub-b, there is a way for me to turn my Tricky routine into a duet. How good are your Roger Rabbit skills? Perhaps I could have a dance off for my partner?

Freddy, I am very skilled at doing artsy obscene things to crotches. And, I think I'll give this bag thing a whirl, too. I know just the place to submit my artistic bag hobbies! I now have a weekend plan... and, I, too, am glad that she didn't shit herself. Rumor has it she left that for Tyra Banks? Does anyone have any further info on this?

Theresa, when it comes to crotches, giving all parties a spin is the only fair thing.

By the way, Damon, EWBL, and Bee, wherever you are - you guys should be tied for first very soon with all the clicking these fingers have been doing lately. My fingers haven't been this busy since...last Saturday night. Ba dum bum.

Bee said...

I saw the crotchy title and RAN over here. (no I'm not a big perv) (maybe a little perv)
Those were hilarious! Is it weird that now I want pineapple juice??

clickin' chicken

Rickey Henderson said...

Yeah, looks like Rickey's favorite female singer is getting booted from the spank bank. Thanks for nothing.

Malcolm said...

I was expecting a crystal meth reference in the Fergie limerick, but the "urine for a big surprise" angle was much better. I'll never look at her in the same way.

what's a donzer said...

Bee, I think that pineapple juice was the only way you could have gone in this situation.

I am truly sorry, Rickey, that you had to shred Fergie Ferg's files from the masturbatorium. At least you still have Pretty Woman, Julia Roberts, if you don't mind a little armpit hair:

Malcolm, I think that a good pun is a sign of a genius. You, sir, are a master. Meth habits, pants puddles - that Josh Duhamel is one lucky guy!