Thursday, March 20, 2008

Sexy Programmer Thursday: Lustapalooza Version 4.0

Welcome, welcome, welcome back, spectators of the sexy! It's time, once again, to feed your techno-desires with a meaty dose of the mega hot International Programming Language of Love. That's right. Let's activate our desire codes and examine some hawwwt interface, for it's time again for Sexy Programmer Thursday!

This week's heartbreaker is a real snake, indeed. You should get a look at this playa's Python! That's his programming brainchild, you rascals! Our love twinkie is none other than the inventor of one of the most extraordinary, spine-tingling programming languages ever coded; that's right, ladies and gentleman - today we are profiling Python stud, Guido van Rossum. Our Dutch treat created the seductive, "general-purpose, high-level programming language" in which the "design philosophy emphasizes programmer productivity and code readability." Hisssssssssssss! Furthermore, this fine specimen is reviled in the techno community - and we can see why! Just check out this comment from a Guidophile named Kiran Jonnalagadda, left on a blog featuring a delicious interview with van Rossum. At 12:45 pm on June 12, 2004, Kiran wrote: "What? You met Guido and all you did was take a picture? If I was meeting Guido, I'd fall at his feet and offer my firstborn. Heck, even that wouldn't be good enough." Amen, Kiran. Amen.

Anyway, I have clearly teased you enough. It's time to get a little action here. My friends, I humbly present to you the FINGER LICKIN' GOODS on smart, sexy (SMEXY!) Guido.

1) Goodtime Guido is the Casanova of Comedy, but, believe me, he's no laughing matter. Need proof our stud has a hot sense of humor? Well, he named Python after that raucous romp Monty Python's Flying Circus. For his contributions as the father of the slinkiest, slyest language out there, Guido is known as Python's "Benevolent Dictator for Life." Commence salute now! I bow down to you, Guid!

2) Our studly superhero is also Compassionate Eye Candy. van Rossum has your back, fellow programmers. He designed Python with ease for the programmer in mind. He obviously concerns himself with helping his colleagues, and he doesn't focus on the bottom line. Well, the ease of Python just gives us more time to concentrate on his bottom line! Yowza! Look what he said about his baby Python: "Because it is a scripting language, learning Python is a snap. Unlike C or C++, written to make life easier for the computer, Python was designed to be easy on the programmer." Now there's one programmer I'll have no problem being easy on! Mmmm!

3) Va-va-van Rossum epitomizes New Age Sex Appeal, fo sho! For fun, Guido enjoys getting his dirty dancing on, a' la contact improvisation, a dance technique that combines modern dance, martial arts, and yoga. It emphasizes "movement improvisation and exploration." Hey, GVR: come see me and I'll show you some improvisation and exploration. You bet your sweet rossum I will!

4) Our boy is a master impersonator. Try to contain yourself as you listen to the sweet sounds of Guido van Rossum as that hot, sexy woodpecker, Woody.

Tap tap tap...who wouldn't tap that?

5) Finally, on his amazing blog (welcome to the blogroll of my heart, Guid the Steed!), our h-h-h-hott Dutchboy is a bibliophile and a philosopohile alike. The self-proclaimed Harry Potter superfan brainiacked the ingenious "Harry Potter Theory of Programming Language Design." How's that? Well, friends, Super Guido brilliantly analogizes the intricate, sexy process of programming design to J.K. Rowling's elaborate creation of the Harry Potter series. Oh, G: you can bring yourself down to our level ANYtime!

So, for those reasons (and so many more), we wholeheartedly proclaim van Rossum the awesome one superfly Sexy Programmer. Oh, Guido: you sly, sly fox you!
wanna see even more hotness? go here:

1 comment:

John said...

Guid, you are unique. In the whole world, there is nothing like you and there never will be.

I wish I knew how you were created. Was it purely random? I must know. Please don't string me along.