Thursday, June 19, 2008

Sexy Programmer Thursday: A Very Special Sexy Interactive Episode Version 15.0

Oooh, lalala my samplers of sultralicious. It's sweeps week here at this blog is eggsalady, and you lucky lovelies are the reapers of the bangin benefits. Congratulations, kids. It's a very special edition of our very special favorite weekly feature Sexy Programmer Thursday. This week's shebang is an extraspecial interactive wafflecone full of arousal. Today, ladies and gentlemen, we are going to buckle up and sidle in to play the hottest game sweeping our sweet planet: Mmmhmm.

Strap on your sexy thinking caps. It's time to play Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician? Are you ready? You were born ready!

And, we're off.

I see that our first contestant has built up quite the biceps, hmmm? How does one accomplish such a lookatme, I'm so hot set of 'ceps? Could it be...monstercoding? Maybe leading? I'm thinking...waving a paddle in the air like you just don't care? So, what is it, my friends? Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

If you said Politician, you'd be right. That soulful guitar slinger is sexy enough to be a programmer, but he's Maryland's governor Martin O'Malley, instead. I can see how there would be some confusion.

Let's try again, kay?

Oh, yes. Coming at us with a comehither look. Help me out, friends. Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

I mean, he's wearing a supersexy badge, forcryingoutloud! Was there ever any question he's a Delicious Deputy of Programming? That 'stache. That stare. Aaah, open source advocate Eric Raymond: I think I love you.

Onward we march.

Oh, hands on hips, my love? You've GQed that ass all over my motherboard. How are we feeling? Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

Yeah, I was ready to go programmer, too. But, this pinstriped poseur doesn't have the sexiness chops to be called commander of code. Instead, our friend David Salcberg is an Aussie Ping-Ponging Olympian. The paddle's almost as cool as the program. Almost.

Ready? Okay!

Why, that's a genial smile. What strokes your keyboard, pal? Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

I know what you mean. But, no. This hotness isn't supporting any systems, he's supporting Oregon as a studly Congressman, David Wu. Woowoo!

Let's go again.

Oh, how I'd like to brush those bangs flirting with this fine contestant's forehead aside with a sigh and a smile. So - Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

That's right. Could it be clearer? This kind of sex appeal could only come from the co-inventor of the RSA algorithm. He coined the term "computer virus", and then he coined the phrase, "My name is Leonard Adleman, and I'm a big piece of coding sex."

Next candidate!

Oh, you hot specimen you. Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

I refuse to believe that this sexy slab of beef has never developed some codelove in his day. But, now, Mayor McCheese sits back with the other politicos and rules over the FryGuys in town.

Alrighty. Next.

Well, hello. You seem quite at home in front of that monitor, Herr Hotness! Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

Well, that fineness is noneother than Eric Owen, one of the best ping-pongers in the free world. Score!

Next up, grab a bite of this. Mmmm!

Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

That pizza sucking seduction is a classic move of part romance, part pure, steamy heat. That brand of heat spells one thing: Programmer. Toru Iwatani invented Pac Man and chomped his way into our hearts. Game on!

Oh, those smoldering eyes. Are they examining some binary bliss, or are they preparing for the Smash? Will the lead others, or pwn others? Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

Oh, Very Young Version of Governor Bill Richardson: People must have thought you were a techie all the time, when all the while you only had aspirations to run a country. I guess if you weren't born with the coding gene, being the likely Democratic VP national candidate is almost as good.

Do you have time for a couple more? Sweet. Give this stud a whirl.

A smoldering stare and a collared sweater? Be still my heart. Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

While reader after reader plays pocket pool, our man Steve Dainton, plays table tennis. He's the the director for the International Table Tennis Federation’s Asia Pacific Office in Beijing, and he's hot to trot. Aren't we all!

And, last but not least. You get one final stab at our favorite game.

Rosy cheeks? A peeking pony? Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician?

That sexy black tee peeking from the sensible v-neck leisurewear can only spell one thing. This leading member of the open source movement is clearly one of the leading sexies in the land. I have so many buttons Brandon Behlendorf could push. And, how!

Who doesn't love gameday? I sure do, and today's Programmer, Ping-Ponger, or Politician version of Sexy Programmer Thursday was no exception. Thanks for playing with me. I look forward to next time.

1 comment:

damon said...

Mayor McCheese rocks.
Sultry smooth, maybe.
Sexy? Only if you're into big buns.

..and I'm clickin for ya donzer.
gotta get you back up in the ranks.